Whole- Five Minute Friday

Again, I'm joining Lisa-Jo at Gypsy Mama for 5 Minute Friday.  I'm not great at this blog thing yet, but I love to write- my prayer journal is proof of that- and this exercise helps me get over some of my hurdles.  So here, I go- 5 minutes of writing about the word "whole" with no editing, criticizing or worrying....

I think I've spent most of my adult life trying to make myself whole- like most people, I'm sure.  I looked for wholeness in friends, romantic relationships, my biological dad, my job, my hobbies, my kids and on and on and on....  Only recently have I realized that I can't make myself whole- only God can make me whole.  In Him, I have found peace that has never existed in my life before.  In Him, I have been able to build a family that makes my heart burst with joyfulness- at least most days.  ;)  In Him, I have come to terms with my relationship with my biological dad and been able to forgive him for hurts that he may not have even realized he inflicted.  In Him, I have found friends who love me for who I am, not for what I can do for them.

I am not perfect, but with Him in my corner, I have all that I need. My wholeness may not be complete until I reach my heavenly home, but with Him in my heart here on earth, I am on my way. I am wholly His and will celebrate that all of my days.

Still

5 minutes of writing about the word "still." When I read that, all I could think was that I don't know HOW to be still! With all of the kids activities, homework, work, housework, grocery shopping, fixing meals, etc., I rarely have time to be still. And when I do find a minute, my poor brain goes into overload worrying about what I might have forgotten to do, or what wasn't done to my standards, or what MIGHT happen in the future. But He tells us "Be still and know that I am God." I know my constant running and definitely my constant worrying and anxiety isn't making Him happy. My bible study group is just getting ready to start "Experiencing God" and it was suggested that we each have a personal goal which we could hold each other accountable to. That will be my goal- finding time each day, to be still, to sit with my Father and feel His peace and love. Time for Him to whisper in my ear that He has my future in His hands and that all I need to do is give Him my best... Just putting that in writing has given me a sense of peace.